Deck 12: Communication in Relationships, Marriages, and Families

Question 1

Research shows that distressed marital couples are distinguished by

A) excessive positive affect.
B) open communication.
C) their negative exchanges during conflict.
D) an overemphasis on listening.

Answer 1

C

Question 2

Enrique and Nicole were civil yet distant in their relationship. They never had conflict, but also never slept together and rarely spoke to one another in intimate ways. According to Huston and Melz, which type of marriage do they have?

A) Hostile
B) Bland
C) Warm
D) Tempestuous

Answer 2

B

Question 3

In his most recent publications, Nick Stinnett has used the term "strong families," by which he largely means

A) attributive.
B) cohesive.
C) consensual.
D) generalized.

Answer 3

B

Question 4

According to classification by researchers Huston and Melz, which type of marriage is high on antagonism but low on love and affection?

A) Bland, or empty shell
B) Warm, or friendly
C) Tempestuous, or stormy
D) Hostile, or distressed

Question 5

In her research on marital communication, Mary Anne Fitzpatrick has found variation among happy couples in their __________ , or ideas about the roles they should play, expectations for closeness and/or distance, and attitudes toward conflict.

A) relationship ideologies
B) religiosity
C) attribution
D) consensual validation

Question 6

John and Danielle were constantly using criticism, passive-aggressive behavior, and contempt during their fights, and they hadn't said any words of love or touched each other for months. According to Huston and Melz, which type of marriage do they have?

A) Hostile
B) Bland
C) Warm
D) Tempestuous

Question 7

The text points out that couples who communicate mutual affection create a contagious "__________ effect" so that the household atmosphere becomes one of emotional support.

A) communication
B) spiraling
C) spinning
D) conflict

Question 8

__________ involves the expression, either verbal or nonverbal, of one's feelings of affection toward another.

A) Impacting
B) Positive affect
C) Partner display
D) Bonding

Question 9

The text points out that the pivotal task for all couples is to

A) communicate effectively when angry.
B) engage in consensual validation.
C) balance each partner's need for autonomy with the simultaneous need for intimacy and togetherness.
D) believe in attribution.

Question 10

Josh and Lizzie were always very physical and lovey-dovey with each other, but they also fought often, sometimes getting loud and physical in their anger. According to Huston and Melz, which type of marriage do they have?

A) Hostile
B) Bland
C) Warm
D) Tempestuous

Question 11

According to classification by researchers Huston and Melz, which type of marriage is high on both affection and antagonism?

A) Bland, or empty shell
B) Warm, or friendly
C) Tempestuous, or stormy
D) Hostile, or distressed

Question 12

According to the text's discussion, conflict is

A) dysfunctional and should be avoided.
B) desirable and should be emphasized.
C) unnecessary.
D) experienced in even the happiest of couples.

Question 13

According to classification by researchers Huston and Melz, which type of marriage is low on showing signs of love and affection but also low on antagonism?

A) Bland, or empty shell
B) Warm, or friendly
C) Tempestuous, or stormy
D) Hostile, or distressed

Question 14

According to classification by researchers Huston and Melz, which type of marriage is high on showing signs of love and affection while low on antagonism?

A) Bland, or empty shell
B) Warm, or friendly
C) Tempestuous, or stormy
D) Hostile, or distressed

Question 15

One year into marriage, the average spouse says 'I love you,' hugs and kisses their partner, makes their partner laugh, and has sexual intercourse _________ as often as when they were newly wed.

A) twice
B) equally
C) about half
D) one quarter

Question 16

Research has shown a link between ____________ parental conflict and children's behavior problems.

A) unresolved
B) physical
C) occasional
D) resolved

Question 17

Your textbook includes a section about "How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk." Which of the following suggestions is NOT one of these effective ways of communicating with children?

A) help children deal with their feelings
B) teach children to play a specific role in the family
C) encourage autonomy
D) give praise and build self-esteem

Question 18

Todd and Erin were intentional in telling and showing each other how much they loved and appreciated one another. They were also not afraid to have healthy conflict when necessary, but always treated each other with respect, even when angry. According to Huston and Melz, which type of marriage do they have?

A) Hostile
B) Bland
C) Warm
D) Tempestuous

Question 19

The text refers to the emotional bonding of family members with the term

A) family cohesion.
B) strong family.
C) resilient family.
D) consensual family.

Question 20

Huston and Melz called both Bland and Tempestuous unions __________ because these two marriage types evidenced only one of two desirable attributes.

A) "mixed blessing marriages"
B) halfway marriages
C) incomplete marriages
D) "lacking love marriages"

Question 21

Crosby points out that, with all good intentions, instead of "working at relationships," couples end up

A) divorced.
B) making work of relationships.
C) in counseling.
D) engaging in consensual validation.

Question 22

Social psychologist John Gottman has made his reputation in the field of

A) clinical social work.
B) marital communication.
C) sex therapy.
D) listening therapy.

Question 23

Randy and Julie are a happily married couple. When they have a problem, they ask each other if their own perception of the situation is accurate, and if they understand the other's feelings. This behavior is referred to by communication researchers as

A) bonding fights.
B) checking-it-out.
C) listener backchannels.
D) de-escalation.

Question 24

James feels that he has an unhappy marriage: He has been angry with his wife for a long time, but he won't express it openly. James's behavior reflects

A) displacement.
B) sabotage.
C) anger "instead."
D) a refusal to express anger.

Question 25

Mark is angry because his wife invited friends over when he wanted to relax. He decides to act bored during the entire evening. Mark's behavior reflects

A) displacement.
B) sabotage.
C) healthy anger.
D) an anger "instead."

Question 26

__________ involves making disapproving judgments or evaluations of one's partner.

A) Defensiveness
B) Sabotage
C) Belligerence
D) Criticism

Question 27

__________ means preparing to defend oneself against what one presumes is an upcoming attack.

A) Criticism
B) Defensiveness
C) Stonewalling
D) Sabotage

Question 28

Social psychologist John Gottman identified "Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse." Which of the following is NOT one of these?

A) contempt
B) criticism
C) sabotage
D) stonewalling

Question 29

Psychologists Nathaniel Branden and Robert Sternberg have developed some rules for nourishing a romantically loving relationship. Which of the following is NOT one of these?

A) be bluntly honest
B) express your love verbally
C) be physically affectionate
D) express your appreciation and even admiration

Question 30

According to psychologists Nathaniel Branden and Robert Sternberg, in order to nourish a romantically loving relationship, couples should

A) share more about themselves with close friends to avoid complicating the relationship.
B) avoid expressing their love materially.
C) accept their partner's shortcomings.
D) take the relationship for granted.

Question 31

Joe refuses to listen to his wife Paulette and is particularly resistant to considering her complaints. Joe's behavior illustrates

A) stonewalling.
B) belligerence.
C) defensiveness.
D) sabotage.

Question 32

Children who report, "I am unhappy a lot," or "I worry a lot," are evidencing __________ behavioral problems associated with emotional or psychological problems.

A) covert conflict relational styles
B) internalizing
C) externalizing
D) overt conflict styles

Question 33

Chronic criticism, nagging, nitpicking, and sarcasm are all forms of

A) poor conflict management.
B) negative attribution.
C) passive-aggression.
D) anger "insteads."

Question 34

The feeling that one's spouse is inferior or undesirable reflects

A) contempt.
B) criticism.
C) stonewalling.
D) belligerence.

Question 35

When Nick Stinnett made his observations of family strengths, six qualities stood out. Which of the following is NOT one of these?

A) appreciation for one another
B) arrangement of personal schedules to be together
C) a high degree of commitment
D) a secular orientation

Question 36

According to Shelly Gable's research the "correct" response by one partner to the other's having something positive happen is characterized by

A) active enthusiasm.
B) measured evaluation.
C) sympathetic understanding.
D) controlled argumentation.

Question 37

Chris is angry with her husband John for spending too much time and energy on his business endeavors, but she expresses hatred for his very expensive car. This is an illustration of

A) displacement.
B) sabotage.
C) suppression of anger.
D) an anger "instead."

Question 38

Mike's wife Lynne resents him going drinking with his friend Dave. Whenever this subject comes up, Mike makes comments like "What can you do if I go drinking with Dave?" and "What are you going to do about it?" Mike's behavior illustrates

A) sabotage.
B) defensiveness.
C) belligerence.
D) stonewalling.

Question 39

According to the text, contempt, criticism, defensiveness, stonewalling, and belligerence

A) can be transformed into positive features of marriage.
B) characterize unhappy marriages and signal impending divorce.
C) are examples of supportive communication.
D) are barrier strengths to divorce.

Question 40

Sociologist Judith Wallerstein conducted lengthy interviews with 50 predominantly white, middle-class couples in northern California. In order to participate, both husband and wife had to define their marriage as

A) happy.
B) conflict-free.
C) characterized by conflict.
D) unhappy.

Question 41

Avoiding or evading a fight is an example of

A) sabotage.
B) refusing-to-accept-influence.
C) stonewalling.
D) positive affect.

Question 42

In a recent book on men and communication called I Don't Want to Talk About It, therapist Terrence Real attributes males' withdrawal to

A) a "secret legacy of depression."
B) a sabotage pattern.
C) refusing-to-accept-influence.
D) negative affect.

Question 43

Deborah Tannen argues that men typically engage in conversation aimed mainly at conveying information, which she refers to as

A) report talk.
B) rapport talk.
C) self-disclosure.
D) ventilation.

Question 44

When Desmond and Penny argue, Desmond often says gets very quiet and insists that nothing is wrong even when he is upset. He is engaging in a mixed message called ____________.

A) gunnysacking.
B) the silent treatment
C) de-escalation.
D) checking-it-out.

Question 45

Emotional intelligence includes all EXCEPT which of the following?

A) awareness of what we're feeling
B) the ability to analyze the situation intelligently
C) willingness to repair our hurt feelings
D) sensitivity to the needs and feelings of others

Question 46

According to John Gottman and his colleagues, belligerence, contempt, and defensiveness are examples of

A) low-intensity negative affect.
B) refusing-to-accept-influence.
C) positive affect.
D) high-intensity negative affect.

Question 47

The text points out that it is impossible to __________ when a person is in the "hating my partner, wanting-revenge, feeling-stung-and-needing-to-sting-back" state of mind.

A) level
B) check-it-out
C) make an "I" statement
D) de-escalate

Question 48

Douglas and Rhonda have agreed upon a time and a place for a fight. However strange this may appear, Douglas and Rhonda have followed the guideline that the text calls

A) avoiding the silent treatment.
B) checking-it-out.
C) running interference on the silent treatment.
D) arguing "by appointment."

Question 49

The text observes that when faced with a complaint from their partner, men tend to withdraw emotionally while women do not. This response is so common that therapists have named it the "__________ pattern."

A) refusing-to-accept-influence
B) female-demand/male-withdraw
C) sabotage
D) belligerence

Question 50

Which of the following is NOT one of the tactics used by stonewallers to avoid conflict?

A) leaving the house or the scene when a fight threatens
B) threatening violence
C) turning sullen and refusing to argue or talk
D) derailing potential arguments by saying "I can't take it when you yell at me."

Question 51

Joline and David have been married for several years. They respond to each other warmly, with interest, affection, and shared humor. Joline and David's behavior reflect

A) low-intensity negative affect.
B) positive affect.
C) refusing-to-accept-influence.
D) high-intensity negative affect.

Question 52

According to John Gottman and his colleagues, anger, sadness, whining, disgust, tension and fear, belligerence, contempt, and defensiveness are all examples of

A) negative affect.
B) refusing-to-accept-influence.
C) positive affect.
D) sabotage.

Question 53

According to John Gottman's research on marital communication and conflict management, which of the following is NOT one of his conclusions?

A) Neither partner should try to de-escalate an argument.
B) Partners need to try to be gentle when they raise complaints.
C) Partners need to be willing to accept influence from each other.
D) Partners can help soothe their spouse by communicating care and affection.

Question 54

Mike has agreed to go out to eat with his wife Ellen, but at the same time yawns and says that he is tired and had a hard day at work. Mike's behavior illustrates

A) a mixed or double message.
B) checking-it-out.
C) an "I" message.
D) martyring.

Question 55

Joanna and Richard have been having a bad day. Joanna asks Richard what is wrong. Richard replies, "Oh, nothing," but the look on his face and his body language suggest otherwise. Richard's behavior reflects

A) an "I" message.
B) the silent treatment.
C) checking-it-out.
D) martyring.

Question 56

According to John Gottman and his colleagues, anger, sadness, and whining are examples of

A) refusing-to-accept-influence.
B) high-intensity negative affect.
C) low-intensity negative affect.
D) positive affect.

Question 57

According to John Gottman and his colleagues, when one partner's first negative expression is reciprocated with an escalation of the negativity, this reflects

A) refusing-to-accept-influence.
B) positive affect.
C) sabotage.
D) stonewalling.

Question 58

Counselors encourage making time for play and new activities in a relationship, partly because new experiences release a pleasurable neurochemical called ____________

A) dopamine.
B) testosterone.
C) estrogen.
D) adrenaline.

Question 59

In communicating with each other, Naveed asks Tasha if his perception of her feelings is accurate. His behavior reflects

A) listener backchannels.
B) leveling.
C) de-escalation.
D) checking-it-out.

Question 60

In John Gottman's investigations, __________ was the only variable that predicted both marital stability and marital happiness among stable couples.

A) refusing-to-accept-influence
B) low-intensity negative affect
C) the amount of positive affect in the conflict
D) anger

Question 61

Marriage Encounter is one of many workshops designed for couples who __________

A) are on the verge of divorce.
B) are separated.
C) want to improve their relationship.
D) are newlyweds.

Question 62

Which of the following is the most helpful "I-statement"?

A) "I felt really hurt when you said that."
B) "I think you're being extremely selfish!"
C) "I know exactly why you did that!"
D) "I hate when you do that! It makes me so mad!"

Question 63

John Gottman and his colleagues made suggestions for better couple communication, and their advice for wives and husbands is the same.

Question 64

Many married couples may feel uncomfortable about expressing anger directly.

Question 65

Keeping love, marital communication research informs us, involves __________-a task largely accomplished by little gestures of appreciation, such as a touch or hug, and also simply by listening with genuine interest.

A) non-verbal communication
B) physical love
C) attending
D) letting our loved ones know how much we care and appreciate them

Question 66

Contempt, criticism, defensiveness, stonewalling, and belligerence characterize unhappy marriages and signal impending divorce.

Question 67

Marital anger and conflict are necessary forces and a challenge to be met rather than avoided.

Question 68

What false belief does your textbook describe as detrimental to relationship?

A) You can treat each other with kindness even when you're angry.
B) Not all negative thoughts and feelings need to be addressed.
C) Your partner should automatically know how you think and feel.
D) Conflict can be a healthy part of communication.

Question 69

Social psychologist John Gottman's research has shown that conflict and anger themselves predict divorce.

Question 70

Experts advise a balanced level of cohesion for couples and families.

Question 71

Wallerstein concluded that the happily married couples in her investigations were frank in acknowledging their serious differences over the years.

Question 72

Success in marriage has to do with a couple's __________, perhaps more than any other social indicator emphasized by social scientists in earlier studies of marital adjustment.

A) gentleness and humor in relating to each other
B) social similarity
C) financial stress
D) age at marriage

Question 73

There is no such thing as __________ conflict.

A) fair
B) necessary
C) conflict-free
D) unnecessary

Question 74

WENRICH and PREP are training programs for married couples that emphasize

A) divorce preparation.
B) couple communication.
C) conflict.
D) martyring.

Question 75

John Gottman found that, in reaching an agreement, happily married people do so

A) very slowly.
B) immediately.
C) rather quickly.
D) with great care.

Question 76

Psychologists Nathaniel Branden and Robert Sternberg recommend that couples should avoid material expressions of love.

Question 77

Conflict is a natural part of every relationship.

Question 78

Stinnett found that members of strong families had a high degree of commitment to promoting one another's happiness and welfare and to the family group as a whole.

Question 79

Research clearly indicates that the tactics associated with winning in a particular conflict are also those associated with

A) higher marital satisfaction.
B) bonding fighting.
C) competition.
D) lower marital satisfaction.

Question 80

One counselor team referenced in the text has suggested "__________ therapy": helping partners accept their spouses as they are instead of demanding change.

A) acceptance
B) primal scream
C) restitution
D) status quo