Carefully Read These Two Passages

Essay

Carefully read these two passages:
Passage 1: "If your employees had actually read the procedures before trying to install the pump, they would have seen that the installation requires that the sealant be allowed to set for one hour before beginning the second stage of the process. Not following this procedure causes the diagnostic to shut down because the sealant has not dried enough to absorb the test stress. To avoid future installation problems, please see to it that your employees read the procedures and read them thoroughly."
Passage 2: "Please note in the procedure manual that the second stage of the installation process cannot begin until the sealant has set for one hour. This amount of time is necessary for the sealant to dry enough to absorb the test stress. If the second stage of the installation process is attempted before the sealant has dried, the diagnostic will shut down."
Explain why the second passage is better and what strategies the writer used to make it a better passage.