Exam 6: Crafting Messages for Electronic Media

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Organize reference material in logical ways with clear headings that promote skimming.

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Business messages designed for large audiences should be carefully scripted and written in a "corporate voice" that is impersonal and objective.

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William has drafted the following email message to the HR manager of Hi-Tech Systems, enquiring if the company has a position open for Software Developer. Analyze the message and point out errors that will likely reduce the effectiveness of the communication. Redraft the email by following the tips for effective email messages. From: willam.chandler@mail.com To: lily.shafton@hitechsystems.com Subject: Need help Hi Lily, Thank you for your time. I am a graduate in Computer Engineering from the University of Waterloo. I am presently looking for a job as a software developer and am interested in working for Hi-Tech Systems. I have been following the company for several years now, and IMHO, it is the best place for a fresher in the industry to learn and grow. Hi-Tech Systems has distinguished itself as the company to have filed for the HIGHEST NUMBER OF PATENTS in 2010! It has also been selected as EMPLOYER OF THE YEAR by leading business magazines for four years in a row. I mean, what's not to like? I passed with honours at Waterloo and received the "MOST PROMISING STUDENT OF THE YEAR" prize at our graduation. I am a good team player, voted leader of my student team. PFA my résumé. Please let me know if you have a suitable position open for me. I hope to hear from you soon. Regards, William Chandler

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Errors in the original email that may reduce its effectiveness include:
- Informal language and abbreviations (e.g. "IMHO" instead of "in my humble opinion")
- Overly boastful language about the company and the sender's achievements
- Lack of specific information about the position being sought
- Lack of a clear call to action or next steps

A redrafted email could be as follows:

Subject: Inquiry Regarding Software Developer Position

Dear Ms. Shafton,

I hope this email finds you well. My name is William Chandler, and I recently graduated with a degree in Computer Engineering from the University of Waterloo. I am writing to inquire about any open positions for a software developer at Hi-Tech Systems.

I have been following Hi-Tech Systems for several years and am impressed by the company's reputation for innovation and excellence. I am particularly interested in the opportunity to contribute to a company that values continuous learning and growth.

I have attached my resume for your review. I would appreciate the opportunity to discuss how my skills and experience align with the needs of Hi-Tech Systems. Please let me know if there are any suitable positions available or if there is a preferred application process.

Thank you for your time and consideration. I look forward to the possibility of contributing to the success of Hi-Tech Systems.

Sincerely,
William Chandler

________ is a form of digital media that provides a variety of communication tools, including status updates, user comments, and personal profiles.

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The amount of content accessed from mobile devices continues to rise.

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Which of the following is TRUE about the use of email as a mode of business communication?

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You need to send a message to your manager, presenting a new idea you have to boost company sales in the next year. This message is a page long and incorporates confidential company information. Which of the following communication modes would you use to send this message, so that it can be reviewed by your manager at his leisure?

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Stakeholders can use social media to help some companies and harm others.

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Which of the following is an effective strategy for business communication on social networks?

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Business emails do not need to follow formal rules of grammar, spelling, and capitalization; they should instead use brief texting language and abbreviations such as LOL and IMHO.

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Which of the following is a risk of using IM for business communication?

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When communicating on social networks, you should ________.

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Which of the following is a benefit of using IM?

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Which of the following is a guideline for creating effective podcasts?

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________ is a measure of how effectively a company engages with its various online stakeholders in a mutually beneficial exchange of information.

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Beth is sending an email to her manager to update him about the status of her project. Which of the following subject lines would best capture her manager's attention?

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Discuss two problems that emoticons and emojis can cause in business communications.

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How can the three-step process be adapted to podcasting?

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Richard is the marketing manager of a company that manufactures and retails bicycles. The company, started by an ardent cyclist with $50 in his pocket, has an interesting history. Richard has framed this as an inspiring story that highlights the victory of small business over big corporations and has put it on the company's website. Identify the compositional mode used by Richard for this message.

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________ is a research technique in which companies track social networks and other media with automated language-analysis software that tries to take the pulse of public opinion and identify influential opinion makers.

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